What if it was our last fight?

It was 11:00 PM and my husband was not back home from work yet. This is not the first time that he was coming home late from office. In fact, this has been going on for weeks. I tried my best to understand and cope up with his hectic work schedules. But I totally lost it that day.

Finally, the doorbell rang. I opened the door and found my husband standing outside. He was dead tired but there was a smile on his face. He asked me how my day was. I was, in fact, waiting for this question. Without thinking twice, I retorted in anger, "I had a great day with the windows, doors, walls and all the furniture of the house."

He smiled back, hugged me and said, "I am sorry! It is just the year-end closing pressure." But I pushed him back and replied, "I had enough of your excuses. I cannot cope up with your hectic life. You have no time for me and our home."

I gave an account of all the adjustments I have made for him since our marriage. He tried to console me and apologised for his behaviour. It is just for a week and things will be better soon. But I was not ready to listen to anything.

Tears started rolling down my cheeks and I said, "I feel miserable. I married you because I wanted to spend my life with you but you don't even have a minute for me." And in my fit of anger, I even said that may be marrying him was the biggest mistake of my life.

The smile from my husband's face vanished. He looked shocked. He asked, "Do you really repent marrying me?"

"Yes." Prompt came my monosyllabic reply.

"Do you even realise what you have just said? I don't like working for 15-16 hours a day. I also want to stay at home, relax, enjoy evening walks with you, watch the TV with you and just be there for you. My life is not easy," he said.

But he was not done. He continued, "I reach home dead tired. But, when I see you opening the door, it brings a smile on my face. I feel happy to come back home to my wife, who desperately waits for me. I enjoy every bite of the dinner that you prepare for me. I feel satisfied to see you sleeping next to me. No matter how tough life gets, I will always stand by my decision of marrying you. I might be your biggest mistake but you are the best thing that happened to me, and I will never ever regret it."

I was in no mood to discuss further. I went to my bedroom to sleep without even serving him dinner. He tried hard to talk to me but I did not respond.

The next morning, I did not get up from the bed till I saw him leaving for work. He came to me, tried to hug me and said, "Goodbye."

I gave him a cold response and said I don't need his hug. He smiled and said, "But I need it."

I didn't call him the entire day; he didn't call me either. The day ended and soon it was midnight, but he wasn't home yet. I had no clue where he was. I started getting bad thoughts. I thought what if he does not return today? What if the hug in the morning was our last hug? What if I never see him standing on the door, smiling again? It started giving me the shivers.

I realised that I repeatedly crib for his time and when I get his time, I waste it fighting with him. He is already under so much work pressure and I am only adding to it. I felt guilty of how I behaved with him earlier.

I immediately picked up my phone to call him, and just then the doorbell rang. I ran to the door and saw him standing outside. Like always, there was a smile on his face although he was dead tired.

"I am sorry again! It is just a few more days of work pressure," he said apologetically.

I hugged him hard and said, "No problem! I understand." A tear or two rolled down my cheeks as we stood there in a warm embrace.

-By Shringi Shrivastava